This one was written when I was all of 16. The “story” itself has a line that says so. Since I was a die- hard romantic (I still maybe), I had connected myself with the bird; the lines have been deleted. I had compared myself with the Nightingale. I don’t wish to hang my identity or existence to any man any more whoever he may be. Notice, how I had written about Nature and had woven a story line out of it.
Anyone who has been following My Writes should be able to compare it with my present day writing style; not much has changed. Excepting: I was too young to have experienced much “hardships”. The only deviation being that My Writes are not romantic anymore- at least My Writes don’t reflect upon that. I am now a die- hard opportunist and an optimistic woman.
Even though written back then, when I was half my age (I am 32 now); it so hopelessly depicts my Life stance. What was I thinking while writing that? For years, it lay placed in my old papers (greeting cards, gifts, drawings); I had saved it carefully to write across someday. It definitely depicts my Life Story till now, I am still posting it in my Mindly Matters Blog for a simple reason that the story reflects upon my thought process, my understanding of Life and my want of emerging as a Triumphant Winner.
Since then, my choice of words, characterization and writing style, have not altered much. I am glad that I am able to post yet another of my “written back then” Writes across.
By the way, I have always felt attracted to Moon. I find it uncanny now that I had romanced about Moon even then! Most of the men I have fancied being with; had a moon name to themselves 😀 My mother’s name- JYOTSNA also means moonlight! At nights, I do talk to the moon whenever upset. I feel mystically strong, looking at that milky glow across the dark sky. As I write this- I now recall that I did use to get up early, to catch a glimpse of the fading moon upon the break of dawn i.e., even when my ruling planet is Sun. I am so full of contrasts.
Last night or may be this morning- since technically 1.30am is morning, I had taken those 3 sheets of stapled papers out and read through the lines. Barely was I able to read beyond a couple of lines- at each reading. It didn’t seem that I had written that years back. I had jotted that down more as notes then and had kept that for final editing.
It got somewhat better since it had dust- stormed yesterday. It had become very pleasant then; today, it’s partly cloudy. No sign of rains yet 😦 I am watching the pigeons fluttering around the terrace and window sill; drinking water from the bird bath. A few of them are snoozing with their legs folded beneath them and eyes closed. Yet two of them are hopping on the a/c unit and trying to peek at what’s inside the window. One has jumped inside the bath and now fluttering to wash itself. Poor things- they look so bewildered in that outside heat.
Hope and wish it rains soon enough and brings across peace and harmony.
I so have an image (and viewing it now in my mind), of a lush green lawn with flowering shrubs, trees and a huge glass house, outside my palatial house. I, sitting outside at the verandah area enjoying my cuppa watching the heavy rainfall and musing that once I had so wanted to be here.
Pingback: I, Me, Myself | Olivia's Life Instances..
Pingback: Moon Woman « Olivia's In- Mind Whirls..