Was that an.. Affair?

30th April- 2006

The last day of my having set foot in Convergys, when I had gone to seek the last of the signatures, (FNF), just as I was about to walkout of the card swiping area at 0 level; VP happen to pass across. We had exchanged greetings, and the cell numbers too. I had saved his number long back- don’t know why. I had walked in the TPT Room, and had asked one of his colleague to pass that. Maybe- the Destiny was calling hard on me.

He would often forward those love- striken sms. Upon plain reading, one could tell how he had badly needed to grow up. This went on for roughly about a year.

March- 2007

While I still worked with Baxy, I had needed a cheque from an Indian Government Bank to be submitted for a Legal Work of mine. Hemant could have issued a cheque from his Central Bank account; or even ask one of his friends to. He had refused. I had asked a few people in my office; none could help me. It was important; I tapped all options possible. Something got into me and I had asked VP to help. He did own an account- BINGO.

Pretty obviously, Hemant had not appreciated my going out in the evening and come back with a cheque within 45 minutes of my going out. I had then bought a few gifts for VP and had met for a cup of coffee at CCD in MN. He had freaked out seeing that small flower bunch, a chocolate and a photo frame (maybe, not sure). Like a small baby, he had kept refusing to accept that. I wondered what was wrong with a man, who was 1980 born, and worked in a good office. He had shuddered on the thought of showing those off to his family. But then, they were only small gifts and as a token of Thanks :-!

He had talked to me pretty nicely. His behavior seemed too sweet for a man! I mean, he was being way too courteous. That was somewhat uncanny for a man. We weren’t dating; so there was no need. A couple of times, he had made funny expressions seeing the caller on his cell. As though extremely surprised and a little scared too- maybe. That was typically- how a demure girl reacts seeing a boy she secretly admires. He had spent more than 10 minutes each time, talking over and moving out of CCD; not that there was any noise to distract him. He would come back and tell me that his colleague had wanted some help with Ban Routing (the routing software). Nevermind.

I now barely recall of how foolishly, I had let him say whatever he had wanted to. What was I thinking? Was I even thinking? My brain cells have now given up on those redundant memories. He had started harping on how he wanted to settle down with me. He knew the fact that I was married. A month had gone by listening to his “songs”, waiting for him to grow tired of them.

My mind had still stayed pretty restless. I could not figure out what was that uneasiness. He was the kind of guy who believed that God gives the Kids; so the physical enjoyment or “exploitation” was out of question. Trying to corner him, I had “agreed” to settle down with him. Now the real VP had come out like a Dracula on a Moon- less night.

T was a love- sick girl; whatever he had done, was for her happiness. Yet another S was rejected by his parents because she was dark complexioned; so he had been in touch to politely stride her away. K was yet another one and so was.. His stories had went on like some teenager- trying to justify her/his musings about the others. Obviously, I was not the kind. And, what for? I had already thanked him enough for his help. I didn’t need to date a compulsive liar. He was anyways no match for me. A few ex- colleague had thought that I was being too judgemental but then I wanted someone who looked proportionate when with me and not like my younger cousin. Moreover, I needed a settlement and not running around the bushes to steal a kiss. And, I had wanted a man- who knew how kids happen.!! I was well aware of my situation that was sticky as glue; only someone with a great mind and courage would have stepped up- others..

I had then declared the end of whatever that was. T had then started calling me up to “patch- up” with him. Arrrggh!! She had called up a few more people that she knew to seek help since I had refused to take both the siblings’ calls. That’s sarcasm- please. I figured that out later that since VP had failed to step- up, she had married someone else! That’s another long story- next time maybe. A gentleman one evening called me up posing to be her cousin. Whatever I knew of T, she was an adopted girl. She had often cried bitterly upon the fact that she had no one around, to seek any help against her husband, who had been beating her up..!!

A voice has whispered in my mind to talk to that “cousin”. And thats how, the cat “came” finally out of the bag.

VP also had tried committing “suicide” and abandon his family and what not to “patch- up”. For whole of 2 hours, he had sat crying outside my house on my birthday to handover those flowers and cake. He had messed that day up for me. This was after 3 months of telling him to get lost. I was not game for any puppy- love or for that matter any love- whatsoever. He was so irritating. Used to address me as Baby, Dear, Catu.. in public. For the sake of all Leo women, we love to be pampered but not by all and sundry and certainly not in full- public view. Spare me the horror. For all the spineless, die- hard romantics and born losers; he still sends me emails and scraps under fictitious names. I had not shared my Orkut details, he had the immense patience to hunt me down..!!!@#!#&^%@#@$

Leech, pile- on or fool- hardy- I have no descriptive phrase for this young man. The amount of confusion that he had cropped- up in my mind about him, was too much to ask for. His parents was looking for a match for him; knowing little that he knew nothing about anything. To avoid any delusions on understanding, he didn’t even know about mast**bation. How I knew that- I had asked him simple. He had never heard of that term, neither he had cared to find out. Consider this; his parents one day had taken him to show him to a S*xologist too. 3 years had passed by and not even a single girl was to his liking. He wants a beautiful girl with excellent command over English language. WANTS- his parents are still on with their “search”. Poor Girl (in advance)

Even writing about him is making me throw up. His sweet image had worn off. He had turned out to be some psycho with unusual temper and absolutely no level of understanding. He had started acting funny and furious. To the smallest of the no- reasons; he acted violently. Sick, some people just never grow up; in every way possible, i.e., He had wanted to wait (to settle down with me), to “take revenge from” his manager! Often he had gone to date with other girls, lying that he had wanted to take money that he had lent, from his friends. His ridiculous stories also included that how he had spent on his girlfriends. If at all that’s true, then good for him. He didn’t deserve much.

Once, he had even transferred 30k into my Citibak account. Hopeless and highly irritating. The amount was definitely reversed; I mean, what was all that? He had then went on cribbing and crying- oh yes, he used to weep! Like a professional mourner.. He had wanted me to “realize” how he loved me and had done that “favor” on me..!! (Since I had quit Baxy a couple of months before its shut down), I may be in need of that money for my expenses.

I need some fresh air.

Often, he called me up and had taken my happiness over no issue at all. He stayed bang opposite across the street. It had taken some time for me to have realized that; upon which, I had retaliated in the same manner. He had turned abusive. I don’t know what he had wanted. He could not go a simple friendship going; neither could he manage an affair; nor was he to commit..!! Leading a life on cellphone – Thanks, I am fine otherwise; infact, better. He would accuse me of I not realising his “worth”. OMG, he stood 5″ tall, had a svelte figure and long hair with receding hairline. He used to fight it out for even 5 bucks with an auto driver. I mean, I couldn’t stand in Noida at 8.30pm, had been out since morning 9.00; just because the driver had asked for 150/- instead of 110/-. Wait, he would also want to peck right in the auto before getting dropped. I wish I had kicked his shin one day and gotten rid of that slimy creature. Oh, he said that we were creatures, and not any human beings.

God, may he RIP. He ridiculed and criticized every thing that he saw. To him, everything was over- priced and not worth. I had told him that if at all, it was him who was not worth it. Knowing I was a qualified Designer, he had thrown his head in air to tell me he painted better..!! When handed over the sketch file, he couldn’t draw an arc, much less Ganesha image. Even a child doesn’t press so hard on the paper, while writing. What was it that he was upto? He was in his late 20’s and not a young boy of 9, who often claim to know everything better than his friend.

Read this out, his parents had even hired a detective; since they had doubted that he had fallen pray to an elder women, who had divorced quite a few men for money already. His own younger sister was divorced by then; couldn’t he think twice before talking crap for some other woman? He had shook the world announcing that his sister didn’t commit that “heinous crime” of sleeping with her husband. Lock this creature in a cage, and tape his mouth.

Phew..!! @#!#$&%^@#$%^&

That pseudo “cousin” is my Employer now. LOL.

Hemant had been practically absent. We met only on weekends, never looked at each other. We had been saving ourselves from bumping into one another.

Moving to Gurgaon from Delhi, wasn’t easy for me and that’s not a cliché. That had only led to another bloody instance that I need some time and courage to type here. It’s still very fresh and hurting. No sign of T, except a call or two in the last 3 years to her “cousin”.

As of now, it’s peaceful and quiet- a little too much quiet. The train that rattles on the tracks or the a/c unit sound; is the only music around. I have spent some time in retrospection that how someone like VP- at all had happened. I wasn’t going through my menopause; neither wanted to mother a baby. Definitely, I had known that he was NOT the man for me. Then; why?

21st December, 2007; I had moved out.

About Olivia

Corporate worker, textile designer, writer.
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4 Responses to Was that an.. Affair?

  1. Pingback: The Phase of Transition | Olivia's Life Instances..

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