Soon, things would turn massively ugly. This is what I have been saving my breath for. I just want to type them all without feeling the hurt, yet again. They have been all very damaging both directly and passively, don’t wish to get hurt again. Then why write? For the relativity, continuity and for all to know my level of tolerance and patience.
I would now run a risk of getting judged, quoted and all such terrible marks slammed on me; and I am more than aware of that. It won’t be possible for me to erase the ugly events without mentioning them. However, that’s only for the purpose of depiction alone. I want all to know everything possible ABOUT ME. And since people have been associated with me in most of these instances, I would have to write about them.
Let me think; in most of those stances, Ruby had stood by me as if watching over. Stepping in boldly, she had made such changes in my Life that were unthinkable of at that point of time. Once again- we maybe diametrically opposite; but she had literally stepped into my shoes- to feel and decide for me.
She had grown up with her siblings alongwith her parents; then, how could she feel the pain of a homeless orphan? She had never been all by herself; yet, she could make me go independent in action. Here- I say what I have felt about her for the past so many years. She not only stepped in where mom had left me; but also had stepped into her profile- quite seriously.
In her, I could hear how mom lectured about things. She didn’t need to do that- I was only a friend!! She has done much beyond my computer keyboard can type words to describe- for me. As if, my mom had comeback in her- in words and in action, both. The same level of discipline, strictness and guardianship was re- invented in her.
No glossy hyper- elated stances; instead, real face of this society and my life incidences would unfold- SOON.
Anything and everything related or relevant to me would be scribbled here.
Nuisance creators- go to hell.. I don’t give a damn. I’ll only write what had happened to me. Anyone affected feeling ashamed? Not my fault. You did what you did; I am only typing them. If it didn’t bother you all to do all; why should I be? I had survived that back then too and so can any day, any number of times- without getting affected while sharing.
I am hard hearted now..