I have become child- like.
Exactly how I was in my teens. I just didn’t realize when I had; unless I had become a recluse. Anytime I sit and think about that “when”, I get to read my life book backwards. It just doesn’t stop at anyone instance or time. It keeps moving like a fire- dragon ancience. The deeper I go, the deeper I get pulled. I only got to know of my having changed to a completely bound- within woman, when I changed back to self!
I have undergone a huge change after I started to write last year- end of March to be precise. Ever since, I have had my share of realizations hitting me faster than before.
I have opened up as how a young kid is.
I am once again ready to research, experiment and explore. I no longer feel depressed. The very reasons that had made me sulk have given birth to a New Me. My solitude and solidarity turned out to be more than any blessing in disguise. It was as if a box full of a whole new universe was waiting for me to discover!
A lot of grudges have left me.
Instead, loads of self- contentment has filled me in. I have made efforts locating all my contacts yet again. It didn’t matter anymore that they had affected my state of being at one time. With the newer realizations giving me fresh perspective of the past matters (which still has their massive branches swaying in my present), I am now thankful to all of them. How else would I have become what I am today?
Writing creates effect of magic like tricks.
Posting my past experiences and present day “developments” in my Blog has definitely given me a language to communicate, express and speak with every one and all; without really getting involved with the person on a very personal level per se. Writing them all has made me realize a lot of things that I could not decipher at the time of undergoing those. My brooding combined with blogging has definitely given me a greater understanding of things.
I feel I am becoming invincible.
I have realized that I have mastered the art of being indifferent. Nothing moves me. I feel liberated. I don’t need reasons (anymore) to celebrate. I have learnt to stay consumed in my own state of super- bliss. Sadness doesn’t affect me any longer.
Awakening has struck me.
They all thought I’ll perish.. here I am- I have flourished!