It couldn’t have been any better!
There’s so much to share about today. I hope that I remember all of it till I write it down here.
I feel I am back to my teens again. I feel liberated like how we used to be in our teens. I am not worried about tomorrow or even later or life in general. All I can hear is my bigger feathers of my wings, flapping over my shoulder. Suddenly I don’t feel that I’ll have to be home bound for any longer. The last few months have been very beautiful. So has been this New Year and the 1st month of 2011.
I woke up. It is supposedly a Sunday today. The first thing I did after opening my peepers, feeling victorious cheating the Pigeon Pair; I had plugged in the pressing iron into the socket, switching it on. I ironed the skirt Ruby has gifted me. Some flowing and frilly one she has bought for me. Needless to say- I love such ones. I even like ironing those to perfection. It had taken half hour pressing all the creases through the tucks and folds.
For the last 3 years I have been wanting to do this. To go out, to watch a movie all by myself. That’s right! I have been shopping all alone; even stopping by to have food- all alone. I stay on my own. I am completely alone- bereft of any known relationship. I like travelling keeping self- contented all by myself. I should have done that too long back.
I was only waiting for some special day to make this happen. A perfect day when I am relaxed, doing nothing and not feeling lazy. I had planned to be out for the whole day- as it is. What better than work towards my New Year pledge? I did it. My New gifted outfit and by Ruby was worn on a special day. Yet to figure out if that skirt made me do that!
Watching movies all by myself, enjoying it, going 3 floors down after the 1st one, buying yet another ticket and watching yet another movie; completely on my own- sheer liberation! I have been completely independent- at times even of my own self. I had badly wanted to do this for past so many years. The 1st time I thought about it, it had felt strange. The 2nd time, it was even more awkward to think about it. Last few weeks I have been dieing to do this but couldn’t find a good moment to get into action. Yesterday seemed to be my day- yet again!
No One Killed Jessica
Some one I know very close had once commented that I better not press charges against my dad. I am not as popular as her that I would create a stir and get any hearing- much less any Justice- if at all that is justified. I won’t mention here how I had felt listening to that one statement. This was at the same time when I had sent him a Notice. However, after watching the movie today, I had felt much better.
I feel positive too.
Watching a miraculous development of chain events leading to her win even after being dead against someone as powerful as who had killed her; my determination has grown stronger. As on date, not a single lawyer wishes to take up this case. A lot of fiddling with the Judiciary is required. There are several of those “laws” missing that would have to be created to even move the Court! I am only hung suspended in a state of vacuum, wanting yet another miracle to strike me- like how it did while searching for dad’s whereabouts.
Getting Back at My Dad
Giving Back at the Atrocities- An Initiation
An Ode of respect for Dad
A Gift for Dad; I Love
Searching for my Dad in the Haystack
The 1st movie had left me in tears.
I could very well identify with Vidya Balan as Sabrina Lall. The run around, the Court hearings and the frustration expressed in her acting had brutally reminded me of how it was at those times.
Even after so many years, I am forced to use a name of a man, who is still absconding- namely my dad. The one who had brought me up has no Legal Identity associated with that of mine, i.e., my mom. This is after my parents were married and I am born out of their wedlock! What a sick Judiciary we have. The Laws we are equally redundant.
All I had wanted was to step out and watch a movie in a Cinema Hall. I didn’t want to get deviated or “entertained”. If at all, I was only brought closer to my present day state of being.
This was a movie of my liking. Completely artistic and a serious drama, portraying Life. Perhaps both husband and wife have a penchant for some “foreigner” visiting India for a film or photography. Why Aamir screamed at the realization of a suicide act being carried at his house before he moved as a tenant was not understood. The treatment was very subtle and yet, it reflected upon our society- exactly how it is. Hypocrite and complicated!
I had reached home at 7 in the evening. I had stepped out at about 12.30 in the afternoon. After over 6 hours of fun, I had felt so tired watching TV. The idea wasn’t to “watch” a movie but to go out alone to do so.
One of my New Year Resolutions has been accomplished.
Dare I say successfully? It couldn’t have been any better! I guess it was more after those chirpy chats yesterday that I got so impulsive.
The only one thing left to do now is to board a plane, while viewing it!