The Lemon Murderer

I have a record of maintaining my cool in the trickiest of the situations.

• Including all the times I was attacked – both verbally and in action!

I have practiced to take deep breaths when the quake had struck this time. My palpitating heart had calmed down way before I had realized. So far, I have never rushed out- screaming- Earthquake! Instead I visit the washroom, change, check the locks (I have 6 verandas in this house), pick the keys, handbag, some “essentials” and my cell before walking down carefully.

• Calculative?
• Cunning?
• Cool?

I haven’t done any fiction yet. But would want to.

I mean why not? Writing about something based purely upon mindly imagination, whereby you take the seat of a narrator; isn’t that like becoming demi- God? The words you write would play upto your mood and appear in the exact sequence to spell a consequence or a stance?

It’s been about a 10 days now I have been thinking of trying my hand- writing one.

It won’t be a fairy tale for sure. Although the image hints at a Devil’s story.

A demon ready to gorge on his newly acquired victim. He seems to be a cultured one since he would use a fork to skin the flesh. He definitely seems to be health conscious too, since he would add some lemon juice on his “preyed” meal.

Ignore those stains, he is a demon after all, doesn’t matter if he has smeared  it all over. Some was smudged over my camera too while doing that image..

I guess I already tried a fairy tale version. For happy endings, this demon always killed the bad guy. Thus he was everyone’s friend..

No, I don’t look at it that way. It doesn’t appeal to me. It would have to be either a science fiction or may be thrilling murder mystery. There, I said it.

I have fantasized enough about how a murder be committed and in a fool proof way; in a way that absolutely no evidence is left to reach out to me.

Was I loud?

If you don’t get involved too emotionally in the act, there’s a certain technicality related to it. A perfect murder would be when the suspect leaves no clues, resulting in an utter- confusion; whereby, guessing about “who may be” proves out to be walking in the woods on a no moon light. Yeah, I say no moon; because the new moon is the next day.

If you haven’t yet figured out, I am talking about escaping the charges after the act has been committed. Just so many times I have woven a story in my mind wherein the victim flees away after “freeing” herself.

Deep down my heart, I feel it’s justified.

I feel highly vindicated if dominated. In a way, I feel she is violated. So in my fiction, it has to be a lady calling the shots. You guessed it, I plan to write about cold blooded murders.

• Kill n disappear!
• Leaving no evidences behind.
• Instead, if the time permits, also burrowing through his assets.
• And walking out in the most composed gait.
• When home, never ever think about what had happened.

If the “criminal” was cruel enough to have napped a woman trying to whatever; I feel he needs to be annihilated. In such a mysterious manner that certain anonymity prevails about the whole instance. I feel restful within after weaving the calm disposition of her exit.

I feel completely aimless after having thought of such a “story”.

As if that’s all that was required to be done. One isolated case of a brutal murder with no facts to build up any case. This may be my dark side. Or the bloody side. Or this exactly may be the Me.

On a lighter note: A lemon feels murdered if the lemonade is not perfected.

Wait, The book if I get to write one (based upon these murderly kills) would be named as “The Lemon Murderer” after her being a smooth operator and also suggesting that she is a woman. The character would stab the “criminals” with her iron fork and celebrate her victory with a bowl full of sprouts salad (as I am now) which can only be perfected with a dash of lemon juice! And no, she won’t leave any behind for a mark- Thanks!

On a serious note: first it was a pitch fork, now a murderer’s fork, where is it going?

• Posted for Magpie Tales 55. Check out the link to read some more of those blood smeared tales 😉

Filed under Coffee Table Stories. Follow the link for Continuity, Relevance or Reference.