Tag Archives: Writing

Lost and found

I am writing this in the times when “search” is only a click away or a tap actually on a touch device. Yet, at times what’s lost seems to be the only prototype making the loss more profound. Anyone would … Continue reading

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Resumed… recovered; life!

She showed up after all… the me me. Along with, she brought some of the best recollection of life long lost… so it seemed not long ago. In the hiding, I was still me. It was time I get her … Continue reading

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Turning away to look beyond

I am sitting from where I still see someone dropping me home one late evening. The moment and several more preceding that became perfect reminders to who I am. Yearlong period of yearning and wishing had met fulfillment in that one … Continue reading

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Celebrating Life

Today is a beautiful day. I’m listening to “a state of trans” while typing this. At work, I was all over the place. I sprawled on one chair resting my legs on the other and yet feeling far from being … Continue reading

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Denouement

That tender cord holding me in shape almost snapped today or so I thought. After the initial shock of realization subsided, I figured it had come off quite a while back. I know this pattern. It hits me when I see … Continue reading

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Celebrating mom’s demise…

Time spent with mum suddenly seems distant. Memories associated are growing hazy like some old discarded mirror left unclean reflecting the light with the dust eating at the contours of the reflection. I haven’t quite survived the loss though I pretended … Continue reading

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Framed

The beaded string wall hangings were out a month back, Ganshu darling was made to sit back at his place a fortnight later. Today, I took mom’s picture photo frames out too. The frames occupied the wall- space as though … Continue reading

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Ground in thoughts

Am I finally embracing my much-ignored-by-me roots or is it that finally I am learning to go back to the shell I belong? Then again, do I belong to any? The realization set my mind back in the time now … Continue reading

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Close down

Yet another movie I finished watching a moment back. Tears know how to flow alone, so I washed them off my face. Still, a tear or two rolled down my cheek. I was losing myself to depression starting from living … Continue reading

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Paired Up

Paired up with a very good looking non- smoker leo in name of my trainer for the next two weeks is what I have earned, not to forget the learning more about the business part- but we’ll discuss that later. … Continue reading

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Celebrating an anniversary

20th January, 2003 One Monday that was (a decade back), that changed my life. I wish I could add- for good. There were people and celebrations alright; but something still had made me cry. I didn’t have a family, so … Continue reading

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Misplaced Relationships (edit)

I have been wedded for a decade now. If only the said wedlock had held true even for a week. I haven’t been vocal about it. To gain what in turn? Some rude judgements? Negating opinions? More questions? My father … Continue reading

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Misplaced relationships

Today’s my wedding anniversary and I am definitely excited. Just how many long years I’ve waited for this day. I saw this date some six years back, well almost… but the day never arrived. Not then. I have been married … Continue reading

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Prayers; I need those not

The day you are ready to do what I want or do if you already are, the day you understand what I need, the day you feel you wish to know what I do (need), the day you do all … Continue reading

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Sleepless beauty

That I am fixing a drink at 3.30 in the morning, could mean one of the following: I may be stressing… Something must be bothering me beyond my ability to handle it… I may be anxious… Perhaps, depression is winning… … Continue reading

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Action replay

Almost all my writes are soaked in my tears. Not in an attempt to find the right word; which, by the way does happen while zeroing in on the title; but, remembering a date from past with similar shades threatening … Continue reading

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Numbed feelings emote

I am sm audacious enough to laugh even in the face of death. That’s how I am known amongst the most. Then there are those who realize this with the passage of time and others who often scratch a wounded … Continue reading

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In attempt to charm the eternal charmer!

Only, I am not amused. The lyrics that I am filling in with really rude remarks of my own out of devout frustration are the ones those I had once sung when in school. Half a dozen songs were given … Continue reading

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Everything’s due to a change now…

My analysis is yet to reach a conclusion! A fleeting thought; yet, expressed and with a load of conviction, conveyed (in time) to the one it concerns. A few highly insignificant things took to occurrence for me to reach the … Continue reading

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Re-reading through time

This is one of those miracles of my own world. Often I am blessed to achieve what I yearn for… maybe in a little twisted way that amounts to a surprise story, a memory to keep always. This isn’t the … Continue reading

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Transitory

I love taking trips… and that is an understatement. To me, the thrill of starting a travel is far greater than the reaching to a new destination. In other words, I don’t look forward to reaching and making the most … Continue reading

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Feelinglessness

I am numb again. For crying out loud, it’s a chewing gum and I am not chewing. Instead of feeling depressed like I did earlier every time it progressed any further; today, I feel light headed- as though unburdened… relieved … Continue reading

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Back to sketching life!

31st may, 2012…5pm Sitting on the table… er rather a chair, placing my diary on the “table” (now), I’m scribbling fast lest I forget the words I wish to pen down to be typed down in a little while from … Continue reading

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Karma… my savior for today!

This instance dates back to when I was in 7th standard. The boys’ gang and I were bunking the Library period. We loved to irritate the teacher. Through the whole half hour of that Friday after the recess period, she … Continue reading

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What about NOW…?

It was in winters last year, December of 2011; when I had popped up the question one more time. I choose to leave it on to the readers’ imagination to take a guess about it. There weren’t any words given … Continue reading

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The Beauty of the Beasts… contd.

Wish Made-It’s about time I might want to say that often, I call upon my destiny by asking for it over and over again. In single breath, I go on chanting night and day, as if meditatively for the “day” to … Continue reading

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Dumbstruck!

6th May, 2012- 6.30pm I am walking the way down to my house. Serenity is playing around as much as loneliness on my state of being. For most of you, “feeling lonely” is a phrase, for me it’s a call that … Continue reading

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Being thrown at; around

I have failed to understand, how can people cut off on me? Am I such a retard that I don’t understand that they possibly don’t want me anywhere around them or is it that I have a great knack of … Continue reading

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Death of a relationship

Firstly, I can’t take rejections, secondly, it stabs my heart to let go of people and then, if I am left to stay dumb… that’s a perfect recipe to whip me into a cryptic psychopath! If I say that this … Continue reading

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It ends here

It’s been a year that I’ve been contemplating committing it. Just who knows I might have taken some step towards achieving the desired outcome already? I am not a coward, that’s all they say; I won’t. But before I fall myself … Continue reading

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Love lost…

… and a piece of my heart too! Don’t ask if we ever loved one another… how does it matter now? It’s the result that matters, efforts don’t count. they only reflect in your concluded concoction. It’s 3.30 past midnight … Continue reading

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Living my life again

It’s been over 2 years floating through a transitional phase! After 33 years, it’s started bringing back to me all that was and lost too. From being a happy go lucky child to over – cautioned teen to a most … Continue reading

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Sketching my life

“Things we lose have a way of coming back to us in the end. If not always in the way we expect.” I would add: rather a li’l too wildly at that. One of the Luna Lovegood’s quotes from the … Continue reading

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Beyond my wits!

It is only right that every end marks the birth of a new beginning! They say all that begins comes to an end so anything that was born will die its own or brought upon it death. It’s also true … Continue reading

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Discovering what Love means

“Love Means Never Having to Say You’re Sorry..” Cold weather, freezing winter winds and one soppy teary Love Story– and what have you? Last few weeks, I have been watching movies, the English movies. Quite surprisingly I have started watching … Continue reading

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Left out..

Just finished watching “Bol” Wish I could put up the same question as the lead actress, the narrator herself does in the movie, to my dad.. Ironically, he is still alive and I’m no better than dead. Why killing is … Continue reading

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DATE of exit

Is that a sign again? I’m thrown back in time- just yet again. How it’s been for a year now, I’m being forced to look at several different times when my life had transitioned to different phases at different intervals. … Continue reading

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Screaming solitude

Lack of communication leads to disaster results- says my best friend Ruby! That’s one of the things I can’t handle besides rejection and indifference. Come to think of it- all of these are very much related to each other. An … Continue reading

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Living some life!

Sharing every detail of the day that just passed by like any other, with a laughter and glow in your eyes like it was a special one.. Sharing the passwords of your internet accounts.. Letting the other one see how … Continue reading

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Lifelessly alone

17th November, 2011 My best friend Ranu Arora who I lost within a few months of our friendship, one who had first created an impression on me to communicate formally even with friends had once pointed out; I tend to … Continue reading

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Flipping over the pages..

12th November, 2011 I read some good number of pages from someone’s diary today. Reading through someone’s mind written down in the most personal manner has always intrigued me since ever. The fact remains that I strongly believed that only … Continue reading

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Please don’t stop the music!

One of the few things left for me to explore and take forward is my passion for music. When I say music, it is beyond listening to a few “fave” songs on the music system as it used to be … Continue reading

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Retroflex

What am I doing again? Just yet another time I let go of my apprehensions. Only this time it was a very hard work! Perhaps, all the things those had happened to me have called upon me for a final … Continue reading

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Not a love- letter!

Introduction: I am starting to write about my present day things- or may I say the details of my soon to be the last phase! I am at the fag end of a helpless and ridiculous arrangement that had turned … Continue reading

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Self- ish Thoughts

I had so wanted to write about the new book I am writing in this post. I will do that here; however, this would be the concluding page or so I think for now. I am now writing the last … Continue reading

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Concluding a relationship!

The last phase of transition has brought upon me yet another period of transition. This is what I have been brooding about since long. The un-canniness of the stances has left me incapacitated. Where do I even begin? My life … Continue reading

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Falling in Love

Sweetheart, Will you hold my hand and come with me to that water fall for once? … Look around; isn’t it serene? Go and stand under that spring. Do it now. … How do you feel? Without your asking for … Continue reading

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Broken!

What is worse than getting hurt? It’s the pain of carrying the spilling tears all the way through your transit to hit the confines of your home to cry your heart out. That throbbing infliction makes you sigh even with … Continue reading

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If wishes could fly..

14th August, 2011 I had so wanted to watch Avatar on Star movies tonight. Not quite remembering the telecast timings, I had switched on the TV while having dinner. The last few minutes were what I got to watch. Not … Continue reading

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Still celebrating

Loud music gives me a mind blowing high; so does vodka and quite likewise a very fast moving vehicle. At this moment, I have mixed the 1st two and am so yearning for the day the 3rd one would be … Continue reading

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